‘…confidence is not something you have, it’s something you create. Being confident is nothing more than a belief in yourself. It’s the feeling of certainty that you can accomplish whatever you set your mind to. Confidence comes from within.’

(Tony Robbins)

But how do you develop confidence as a leader, especially if you have just made the transition to leadership?

Over the years I’ve heard many people talk about ‘fake it till you make it’. I’ve never been a fan of this approach, but it has worked for many people I know. My ‘confidence’ journey has been very much based around the development of my belief in myself as a person and then my belief in myself as a leader. This has happened over time as I initially transitioned into a leadership role and then was exposed to a wide range of challenges and experiences over the years. I am comfortable with who I am as a leader which is the basis of my self-confidence.

I still remember a time, early in my leadership journey, when I was intentionally intimidated at an important meeting where I was the only female, presenting a significant business case.

It was a challenging experience, but I was calm and confident in the way I responded during the meeting. I had planned and prepared well and believed in what I was presenting… and ultimately I was successful in achieving the desired outcome. I learned a great deal from that experience about the importance of self-confidence and still reflect on it.

What are some practical tips for women working on their confidence as leaders?

• Know who you are and what’s important to you. Be clear about your beliefs, your values, your strengths and areas for development.
• Be comfortable with who you are. Believe in yourself. Be authentic.
• Understand your ‘why’: what drives you to do what you do.
• Stretch yourself, by starting small and slowly exposing yourself to new and different experiences. Be curious. Challenge yourself.
• Learn from your experiences through self-reflection and seeking feedback from others.
• Plan well and be prepared when taking on new experiences… stay calm and expect the unexpected.
• Be flexible, open and adaptable in your approach to situations. 
• Be a lifelong learner.
• Develop a positive attitude and positive self-talk.
• Seek out a mentor or coach to encourage and guide you.

‘Believing that you’re enough gives you the courage to be authentic.’

(Brene Brown)

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In my last post I spoke about vulnerability in public speaking. This time I want to share some tips that have helped me build my confidence over the years in public speaking.

Everyone has different techniques and approaches that they use, but here are some that I would recommend based on my own experience. This is not a comprehensive list, but rather, a sample of some very basic and practical things that you can do whenever you are speaking in public. Your confidence as a public speaker will only increase over time if you follow some of these.

1.    Be well prepared. If you fail to plan you plan to fail. Planning is always the key to success.

2.    Know your topic. No-one knows your topic better than you.

3.    Have a well-crafted and structured script that you know well. Remember that words are powerful… but try to keep it conversational.

4.     Practice, practice, practice, practice… not in front of the mirror, but out loud as if you are already on the stage. Practice on your own and in front of a trusted friend who will give you honest feedback.

5.    Speak from the heart and be yourself. Emotion will always trump logic. Be humble and authentic.

6.    Less is always more. Keep your message simple.

7.    Pace yourself and stay focussed.

8.    Use stories to illustrate aspects of your speech. Stories are powerful.

9.    Know who is in the audience and speak to them.

10.  Remember to smile. It will help you connect with your audience. 

And one more…

11.  Remember to breathe…….. it will help to calm your nerves!

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As your career progresses and you move towards more senior leadership roles, you will experience many changes to how you relate to people within various structures, like moving from managing a small team to managing groups of managers! Eventually, as a CEO, you are managing the whole organisation, and this can at times feel isolating and lonely.

Some of the discoveries I made along this journey to CEO:

·     Your role changes from being an expert in a particular field to being across all fields and necessarily letting go of the detail to focus on the big picture. This can be challenging for a lot of people – it’s a whole new way of thinking! But as a CEO your primary roles will be as a leader and an influencer.

·     To ensure success the CEO must ensure they are surrounded by capable people who know more than they do about various aspects of the organisation. You will be relying on these people completely! I believe that leadership is a ‘team sport’.

·     More than ever, as a leader of an organisation, you will need a firm grounding in self belief. You must know yourself really well and while acting with conviction, should be humble enough to continue to learn from others.

·     As CEO, you will not be able to be ‘best friends’ with your colleagues who now report to you. This is felt keenly when you move up to this position within the organisation you have worked in for several years. Inevitably, these relationships must change.

It can be lonely in leadership roles, and it’s important to support yourself in new ways, such as talking with new peers, being part of leadership organisations, or working with a coach or advisor. This will help the transition and make your journey all the more rewarding!

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There is something inside all of us that we can draw on, in times of need…. our inner strength. With experience and time, you become confident in the knowledge that it will always be there when you need it.

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